Final Stretch and MORE

I feel terrible that this journey hasn't been filled with as many updates as my first, but honestly that's a good thing. Everything is going smoothly and VERY fast. I'm just a regular preggo with no excitement going on other than the fact that little lady is growing perfectly.

 I am officially in my last trimester! The summer is keeping me super busy and before I know it this baby will be going home with mom and dad. My c-section is scheduled just a few days shy of the first day of school. Mom and dad can't wait! It's funny how slow these journeys start out and then I blink and it's all over. I think every post I'm fighting back tears for one reason or another. The goal is give them their baby, but I grow to truly love and care about these families. I love being pregnant and I love babies, but I honestly do this for the parents. They are remarkable individuals and I am so happy to know them. 

Journey #1 Update:

Can you believe the twins are 2?! T.W.O!!!! Orion, Jagger, Willow and the whole Vincent family are doing fantastic. Mom checks in on me all the time and random pictures of the kiddos fill my heart with so much joy that I could literally burst.

Could they be any cuter?

My next post will hopefully be filled with sappy pictures and exciting news of a new little person to enter the world. I just can't wait to see this little girl!

JUST

WHEN

YOU

THOUGHT

THIS

POST

WAS

OVER...…..

I have news for you.

We all know that stress can wreak havoc on your body. Take away that stress and amazing things happen.

And I mean AMAZING things.

Meet baby A #2

That's right, it happened again! I am completely mind blown! Needless to say, so are mom and dad. They have never made it this far in any pregnancy and everything looks perfect. She is due December 23rd while I am just four months earlier due August 24th. AHHHHH you guys I want to shout from the rooftop! I always feel a tinge of guilt being pregnant with someone else's baby. I put myself in the mothers shoes and my heart aches. She doesn't get to feel her baby growing or experience even the not so fun parts of pregnancy. Each of my mommas will now get to experience everything they tried so hard for. It flat-out brings me to tears. So many happy tears!  

My request to you is to pray for this little momma. Pray she has the best most uneventful pregnancy she can have! I just couldn't be any happier!

 

Learning to Trust

You would think that with this being my second journey things would be a breeze. Sure, I know what I am doing with doctor appointments and medications, but emotionally I have been a mess. After transfer, I questioned everything I did. Was my shower too hot, did I keep my feet up long enough, were my feet too cold, did I move too fast? Every little superstition you read from fellow IVFers runs through your mind.  You tell yourself that nothing you do can affect the outcome of this baby implanting and thriving, but you secretly know you will be devastated if that pregnancy test comes back negative. Once you get that positive, the worry is still there. Are my hormone levels high enough? I feel good today.. great, something must be wrong, on top of being scared to use the restroom in fear of finding blood. I think the biggest worry of all, is watching my intended parents hearts break if we don't find a heartbeat. I don't want to be a reason for them to hurt, I want to bring them so much long-awaited joy.

                                                                  Baby A at 7 weeks

                                                                       Baby A at 9 weeks
                                                                  Cutest little gummy bear



Thankfully here we are almost 11 weeks and things are going perfectly. I have graduated from the fertility clinic and am now in the hands of my OB. The best thing- I am off all medications! Those hormones are no fun. I swear they make pregnancy symptoms ten times worse. Day by day I am feeling better and not finding myself in bed before 7! I am beyond excited for my intended parents and with every passing week I can see the excitement in them which is exactly why I do this.

 I have been granted permission to share with you a bit about this amazing couple, so without further adieu:

Meet Brian and Sarah. They have been married for eight years. Two years into their marriage they started trying for a baby. To make a long story short, doctors could never pinpoint exactly why Sarah was struggling to conceive and stay pregnant. Everything they deemed an issue they thought they could fix. They literally exhausted every option in an attempt to grow their family. Meeting with a reproductive immunologist, a rheumatologist, a high risk OB-GYN, a reproductive endocrinologist, and an acupuncturist. They were able to conceive naturally, but never made it to a heartbeat. They had a few failed rounds of IUI, and 4 rounds of frozen embryo transfers. This sweet couple has had a total of seven miscarriages, including one ectopic pregnancy. With one embryo left, they took a leap into the surrogacy world and met me! The goal now is to nourish and love this little belly buddy until I can proudly ugly cry while watching them hold their baby for the first time.

Here We Go Again!

Medical clearance ended up being a breeze. Meeting my intended parents for the first time, not so much. I hung my head as I walked into dinner over 30 minutes late because I failed to check the address on my GPS destination. FYI there are two Houlihans on 119th street in KC, about 30 minutes from each other. Thank heavens they were so understanding by the time we made it there and let me tell you they are so sweet. We all left dinner with a peace knowing if its meant to be, it will be.

IT'S MEANT TO BE!

Over the last month in a half we have been playing the waiting game. Insurance has to be reviewed, contracts have to be drafted and discussed with separate attorneys with hopes of having everything finalized by my next cycle. The clock never stops ticking and that alone can be stressful. A minor setback in paperwork might seem like no big deal, but in the surrogacy world it can throw transfer off for another month. We narrowly made it in time. The first step in prepping myself for transfer is birth control which starts today. Isn't ironic that in order to get pregnant we start with the pill that prevents it? Injections start next week and transfer is set for December 6th. I have contemplated being a little more open with what I'm doing on a daily or weekly basis involving my transfer calendar. This would be a great way for you to see what countless women do month after month for sometimes years with hopes of getting pregnant. I will either start a separate Facebook page to follow or continue posting on my personal page. It's just talking my shy,/nervous self into it.

 As always, please keep me and this family in your prayers. I am so excited and nervous to walk this crazy, beautiful journey again and to have all of you along with me.

Journey #2?!

It's kind of surreal to be back on here writing. I am super excited to say in July I was approached from an out of state couple looking for a surrogate. We ended up not being a match for one another, but there's a kindling in my heart again and when my previous agency reached out to me I knew I needed to listen.

As you are reading this I am on my way to meet ANOTHER Kansas couple. Emotions and nerves are high. This evening and tomorrow are big days, we are blindly walking into dinner with two people we know nothing about. As I sit here terrified, I also put myself in their shoes. I can't imagine anxiously awaiting to meet a woman that could possibly be the person to help bring your baby home. *cue heart palpitations* 

Tomorrow I meet with their reproductive endocrinologist. I have a few extra hoops to jump having had three c-sections. Each c-section poses a risk and that is not taken lightly in the surrogacy world. I will be poked and prodded and have every bit of my medical history scrutinized. Jared and I also have a three hour psychological evaluation. 

I keep telling myself if this is meant to be everything will work out. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I walk this crazy, exciting road again. 

P.s. The twins and their family are doing amazing! Their support and love on a possible second journey has been so reassuring. 

Long Overdue

Where do I even start? Life became super busy after I had the twins. I soaked up every bit of my maternity leave with my children over the summer and I had a shift in my position at work that has required crazy amounts of my time. It's been six months since I gave birth to my sweet surro babes. That is so crazy to say SIX MONTHS.

There were a few things going into this surrogacy that I wanted to experience if possible, but ultimately would be happy with whatever the outcome was. I was hoping to carry a boy since I had my two girls, I wanted to be able to make a surprise call to their mamma when it was go time, and I wanted to experience what actual labor is like. I am a repeat c-section mamma so the last two in my mind were most likely not going to happen, but we can all dream.

In my last post I was 32 weeks and things were smooth sailing. My, how things can change in the blink of an eye. Just a short week later, I found myself in labor and delivery with some pretty intense cramping. That cramping turned out to be contractions that were progressively getting worse. After a few different medication attempts to stop labor the choice was made to transfer to a bigger hospital more equipped to care for preterm twins. The boys took their very first airplane ride in utero! To make a long story short, labor was finally stopped and I was released after 4 days in the hospital. I was put on bed rest so we could hopefully get the boys to at least 36 weeks. Trying to waddle myself around would get the contractions stirring, but thankfully would stop if I cooled my jets. For those of you who know me, taking it easy or having others do things for me is not easy. I did it though! I hit 36 weeks and with the boys trying to call the shots, I had a new c-section date set for June 26th at 37 weeks 1 day.

The boys had different plans and were most definitely still calling the shots. June 22nd was an off day for me. I had told the boys mother that I had felt off all day. I was emotional and just in this weird funk. I literally bawled trying to get a package of meat out of the freezer. I went to bed that evening more uncomfortable, hot and flat out more miserable than normal. At almost 37 weeks pregnant with twins uncomfortable is a way of life, so I didn't think anything was actually going on. Around 1am I was sleeping, but coherent enough to feel a pop. Let me tell you that getting out of bed at this point is a sight for sore eyes. It’s this attempt of rolling/sliding off the bed to hopefully make it to your feet and then catching your breath once you are up. I wish I had a recording of myself getting out of bed when I felt that pop!! I deserve a medal for that move is all I know! I was up and out of bed before a huge gush of water hit the floor. How I didn't get a drop on the bed baffles me. This wasn't a trickle of fluid it was a flood. Shaking like a leaf I woke my husband up who thought I was having a leg cramp until he felt my wet leg. Its funny how a little amniotic fluid will wake a person right up. He flew out of bed and grabbed me a towel to contain the lake I had around me feet and I made my way to the bathroom leaving a trail behind me.

When I made it to the bathroom, I called the boys' mom. She answered in just a few short rings. Excited and scared this was it. The boys were coming! She was going to get things situated at home and they would be on their way. After a few more phone calls we left for the hospital. At this point, I wasn't contracting. If I was, I didn't know it from all the adrenaline. We made it just outside of town and the pain started. Contractions. Real active labor contractions are no joke! Add two moving babies and leaking fluid in the middle of a contraction and you have a full on party! We made it to the hospital shortly after 2am, I think. I was definitely in labor- contracting every 2 minutes and ready to finally meet these boys. Mom and Dad made it to the hospital around 3am and we had a c-section time for around 6. At 6:33am Orion 6lbs 8oz and Jagger 6lbs 5oz met their mom and dad. The one thing I wanted my intended parents to know at the birth was not to worry about me. This was their long awaited moment with THEIR babies. I wasn't going anywhere. After they had their time alone to count fingers and toes and to just stare at that those beautiful little beings, I'd be there. I after all, I had them with me for almost 9 months. Shortly after recovery when I was feeling much better, Shiloh and Lindsey AKA Dad and Mom introduced me to the boys. With tears in each of our eyes, Lindsey handed me Orion. I can tell you there is no greater feeling in the world than to watch two amazingly-deserving people look at their babies. Little memories that only I can keep like the smile Lindsey gave her son while she fed him or the way Shiloh lowered his ear to make sure they were breathing. Those little moments are why I wanted to become a surrogate. The indescribable joy I received from my children, I was able to give back.

Seven weeks after the boys were born, baby C that Lindsey was carrying was born. Willow is a beautiful, head full of dark hair angel. It is one busy household with four children all two and under, but it’s also one blessed household. From adoption to surrogacy to natural conception it's not a story you will hear of often. To think I'm lucky enough to be part of it!

I hear more often than not, “that had to have been so hard”. No, it wasn't hard. I knew exactly what I was doing going into this and those sweet little boys were not mine. Now, was it emotional? Yes. The day we all were discharged from the hospital, I was a mess. Ugly crying is an understatement. I wasn't sad, I was overcome with emotion. This long journey had came to an end. This wasn't goodbye. I knew I had gained a new family. I got more than what I prayed for. An amazing family, close proximity, TWO boys, a surprise birthday, a taste of labor and most of all, a bond. Because of surrogacy I am a better wife, mother, friend and teacher! 

Last but certainly not least, I have to thank my husband. He graciously sacrificed his wife for a year while I fulfilled my dream. He was my shoulder to cry on, shot giver, maid, and Mr. Mom. He was just as involved in the process as I was and I could not have done it without him. Thank you babe. 

40 Days to Go!

I'm sorry to all you that have been anxiously awaiting an update. Making it to my 3rd trimester, there hasn't been too much to update on. I can't complain, as that means things are going perfectly.

At 28 weeks I failed my first glucose test. I was super bummed and worried that it would cause complications as we made it through the last 10 weeks of pregnancy. However, I passed my three-hour glucose test!

 

Both boys are growing on track. Two weeks ago, they were chunky little monkeys weighing in at 3lbs 14oz and 3lbs 5oz. Baby A is breech while baby B is head down and presenting. I have a scheduled C-section for July 3rd if I don't go into labor before hand.

Most you have been asking how my intended momma is doing with her pregnancy, and I am very happy to report that she's doing fantastic. Absolutely no complications so far and baby looks beautiful. I do know the gender of the little bundle in her tummy and have been given permission to share it if I'd like. I'd love to tell you all, but kind of enjoy the power of not telling!

I can't be that mean.....baby C is a.........

GIRL!!!!!!!

How exciting is that?! They are going to have one busy, blessed household with two girls and two boys!

As for myself, I am feeling large! The 3rd trimester always seems to take the longest to get through just because you are so uncomfortable. I will miss these boys when they are no longer with me, but I'll be ready to get back to my normal self. 

32 weeks

This will probably be my last post until the boys are born. I can't thank you all enough for all the support we've received. Every talk, message, or post has meant the world to me. Praying that we have a smooth and healthy delivery is all I can ask for. I can't wait to share the news when they arrive and update you on how we are doing!

I Didn't See That Coming!

17 weeks until we get to meet these little boys! That’s if I don’t go into labor or my water breaks beforehand. I would absolutely love if I could call their mom and dad to say its baby day by surprise. I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed. Our 20 week scan looked great with baby A weighing in above average at 14oz and baby B at 13oz. Both babies will continue to put on weight as a singleton until 28 weeks when twin growth usually slows down.

As for now I’m feeling fantastic and honestly feel like I’m caring only one baby. On occasion I’ll have a difficult time breathing. My guess is the little stinkers are stretching out and compressing everything up into my lungs. Cravings are still fresh fruit and veggies, breakfast foods always sound good and a weird concoction of Spaghetti O’s with cottage cheese, which I did not consume because I didn’t have Spaghetti O’s, but man it sounded so good at that moment.

For those of you who don’t follow me on Instagram, I received Belly Buds from my intended parents. They are little speakers I stick to my belly and with an app their parents can record anything from a simple conversation, storybooks, or  dad playing the guitar. It’s been so important to me that the boys hear their parent’s voice daily and now with working little ears we have a new bedtime routine with our Belly Buds. The boys love it! I didn’t think I’d get such an immediate response, but the boys moved like crazy the first night!

With permission from my intended parents I have been granted the opportunity to tell you a little bit about what lead them to surrogacy and some BIG news. 

My intended momma never had a normal menstrual cycle in her adolescence, so it wasn’t a big surprise that they hit a speed bump when they decided to start trying for a baby. After seeing doctors it was discovered that she had a bi-unicornuate uterus . A bi-cornuate uterus is heart-shaped with two conjoined cavities. A typical uterus only has a single cavity.

After surgery to remove the smaller section of her uterus and a fallopian tube they decided to give IVF a go. My sweet intended parents dove right in with a few egg retrievals, three IVF transfers which were unsuccessful and  two cycles for transfer that were cancelled due to her body not being where it needed to be for transfer.

With a big sign from God they decided to stop the IVF process and start an adoption journey. They were instantly matched and have a beautiful daughter that they are so proud to call theirs. She is truly the apple of their eye and so very blessed.

Now that left them with the question of what to do with the three remaining embryos they had frozen? After long conversations and healing they decided to look into surrogacy. This is where we met and I knew there was something special about them. And so to now you have read and followed our journey to this point!

Imagine my shock and disbelief when on a “girls” day with my intended mom she pulls out a sonogram picture. I’m pretty sure my mouth hit the floor as we both were fighting back tears. After years of trying to get pregnant and finally having babies via surrogacy BAM pregnant. I am so happy to say that baby C (the intended moms baby) looks great to date and I am officially 8.5 weeks ahead of her with my pregnancy. Not many surrogates get to walk the pregnancy journey with their intended mom. This is just another blessing and one more thing that makes our story truly incredible.  

Mind blown, right?! It’s still crazy for me to think about. While I always ask for prayers I now would like you to add the new little one growing inside my intended momma and for her as well. I want happy healthy pregnancies and babies all the way around!

One Trimester Down,Two to Go!

110 pills (that consisted of birth control, antibiotics, steroids, and baby aspirin), 54 injections, 119 patches, and 141 vaginal suppositories over 102 days, BUT we've made it to 14 weeks. I can't believe I'm 1/3 of the way finished with this pregnancy. Some days I feel like it's creeping by, but in the blink of an eye these babies are going to be here!!!  Right HERE!!!

December was bittersweet for my intended parents and I. On December 18th I officially weaned off all medications and graduated from Colorado Center of Reproductive Medicine to my regular OB/GYN. We developed such a wonderful bond with our nurse and a sense of security being in their care that it’s sad to let them go. On the bright side, this means the boys are growing and my body is doing what it should to help these little guys meet their parents!!!

I have definitely been hit with more "morning" sickness than I had with the girls. My evenings were down right miserable and usually landed me in bed by 7 most nights. I am starting to feel much better this week and my energy is slowly coming back!!! I've had cravings for fresh fruit and vegetables, anything spicy, and pancakes so far.

For now I see my doctor every 4 weeks and both boys have sounded fantastic at each appointment to this point!!!  I've gained 14 lbs from the start of meds to now. Not too shabby considering fertility drugs can take a toll on your weight. We will have our 20 week anatomy scan in just SIX short weeks. I am really excited to see how much they have grown and for mom and dad to see more than little blobs on the screen. Prayers that we keep trucking right along.

Give Thanks

Thanksgiving is a time to come together to share what we are grateful for. Today I'm thankful for all the love and support I've received from everyone. I'm also thankful for my amazing intended parents. I can honestly say they are more than just intended parents, they are family. I love and care for them like I have known them for years. No matter the outcome of this cycle I knew we gained some pretty special people in our lives.

Today's appointment took forever to arrive. Once we finally made it to 1 o'clock they kept us waiting on the edge of our seats in the waiting room. Patience most certainly was hurting me.

I am over the moon to say we have heartbeat. Let me rephrase that, I am ecstatic to say that we have HEARTBEATS!

Baby A and Baby B are measuring right on track with new heartbeats measuring at 114 and 117 beats per minute perfect for this gestation.

Not only do we have twins, but we have genders too! Both little bundles of joy are BOYS!

Again, I ask that you keep us all in your prayers. Prayers that these little ones grow and that this pregnancy goes nice and smooth over the next 7 months. Thank you Lord for this wonderful blessing!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Results

Waiting for beta results has been agonizing today. Waiting all day just to hear that magic number can truly make a person insane.

I went from insane to flat out stupid after I got the call. 

I couldn't process anything going on around me. 

Not a word.

Not a thought.

Not a darn thing.

Am I pregnant?

Beta hcg levels needed to be at least 50 to confirm pregnancy. My levels.......

716......716.......omg 716!

I'm so very pregnant! I couldn't be happier! I'm still in awe that I have been given the chance to do this and it's actually happening.

Please pray that these babies grow big and strong and that we see heartbeats in 16 days. Sono will confirm if we have one or two babies growing, but I'm feeling like we definitely have two!

PUPO (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise)

We all were going a little stir crazy waiting for transfer this afternoon. We had so much peace that everything was going to go perfectly, but yet couldn’t help to be nervous about nothing and everything. We left for CCRM at noon and immediately had labs drawn. From there we ventured upstairs to the surgery center where I entered “the room.” I had acupuncture then waited for the doctor and the embryologist to come in. It all went so fast from there.

The embryos are wheeled in an incubator where we were able to see them up on a screen.  The embryologists then sucked the little embabies into a tiny little catheter and then were given to the doctor to place inside my uterus.  The procedure was completely pain free, minus some discomfort from having a completely full bladder.  I was laid flat and had another acupuncture session and was able to get up an hour later.

We transferred two beautiful little babies.

The embryo on the right is fully hatched while the embryo on the left was in the process of hatching. The really neat part is in about four hours the hatching embryo should be fully hatched and would look like its sibling on the right. 

It’s a huge relief to be done. Now the hard part is the waiting game. My first HCG blood test is a long ten days away. In the meantime, I’ve been placed on bed rest and can continue normal activity Sunday when we will travel home. I am so lucky to have such amazing friends and family. Every text, message, and post I received today meant the world to me. You all are stinking fantastic! Once again, keep us all in your prayers and send lots of sticky baby vibes our way. 

"Did Someone Say Transfer?!"

I’m sorry I haven’t updated my blog in so long. It’s been a crazy few months and I wanted to make sure my body cooperated with meds before I spilled the beans on a transfer date. The wait is over! I’m set for transfer this Friday, October 28th! So many emotions are going through me. I can’t believe I’ve made it to this point and with the most amazing intended parents ever. The support and love I feel from them is the greatest feeling in the world.

I have a few specific prayer requests. For safe travels as we all make our way to Denver tomorrow. Prayers that the embryos thaw beautifully and last but certainly not least that they stick around to meet their wonderful parents.

I want to give a special thanks to people who have reached out with support, kind words, as well as the ladies at work covering for me during early morning appointments and missed work. The little things mean the most. I will update Friday or Saturday!

Where there's a will, there's a way.

I wasn't anticipating on writing another post so soon, but I couldn't be happier to be doing so. Almost immediately, I was presented with a different potential family to carry a baby for. I read their profile and looked at pictures, but I just couldn't keep myself from comparing them to my first family. As much as I tried I couldn't let them go. 

 So that door that closed, never latched. In my heart I never felt like things were final between my intended parents and myself. Sometimes in life you just need time to breathe and regroup. I am beyond thankful to say that we are moving forward on this crazy journey. Final details are being wrapped up and I'm hoping to have a transfer date set in the next week or two.

Thank you to everyone who prayed and to those who've dealt with my emotional self over the last month. I'd be lost without some these amazing people in my life. 

When you feel like quitting, remember why you started.

Today has been a rough day.

When I first started writing this post, I was going to caption a picture with, "This is what surrogacy looks like." The second I started typing the words, it hit me. THIS is just a glimpse at what infertility looks like. Doctor's appointments, lab work, injections, oral medication, patches, and vaginal suppositories all to prepare for transfer of the tiny embryos you hope will grow and flourish. This doesn't include what a woman endures to prep for egg retrieval just to make it this far for IVF. I am truly humbled by the trials and tribulations that couples face with infertility.

A friend tagged me in that article that led me to a blog that really touched my heart. Scroll through the pictures and I dare you not to cry.
www.fifteenfiftyone.ca%2Fblog%2Flife%2Fbaby-julie-portraits%2F&h=iAQHyJvXf

"The walk to parenthood is one that looks very different from the one person to the next. For some, that road is wide and vast. A perfectly paved surface that leads directly to a place that was always meant to be. For others, the road takes a few turns and requires a few detours. But for others still, that path is barely even carved out among the woods. It is nothing more than obstacles and hurt and loss and a constant struggle to a place that is entirely unknown."

I passed the rigorous one-day workup with flying colors and we were working on having contracts done this week with hopes of starting meds this Monday. I am heartbroken to say that as close as we got to this dream, it's been put on hold. Infertility is not cheap, and the economy only makes it harder. If you would please keep my intended parents in your prayers, as I can only imagine how hard it is for them to have to put their dream on hold. As for me, I will wait and see what God has planned. When one door closes, another one opens.

While I am so thankful for the income of support and kind words, I want you to take a minute, sit back, and look at all the blessings you have. While things may not be perfect or ideal, you never know the hurt and stress another might be facing.

Last Big Step

Just when you think you have all your ducks are in a row, one waddles off. June turned out to be a very stressful month. To make a long story short, all my prenatal records needed to be sent to my intended parent’s fertility clinic for them to review and accept me for further testing. They received my file, but unfortunately it was only my delivery records. No problem, I call my OB to get my records sent again…well, there was a problem. They implemented a new computer system and scanned each file in to their system by hand. My file was scanned in, but scanned in wrong. MY FILE WAS COMPLETELY EMPTY. This led me on a wild goose chase trying to track down my file from CKMC (which most of you know is now closed). Multiple calls later, and the lady in the medical records at St. Rose she thinks she may have found my file. But it would have to be ordered and she only works one day a week, so I had to wait for the following week.  Patience most certainly at that point was hurting me. I had St. Rose on speed dial the following week and blew up the medical records line until I finally got a call back. They had my file! So I had to get it sent to the clinic and wait for a call on my acceptance.

I finally got the call and I’m set to have my one day workup tomorrow! For those of you curious what a workup looks like for a surrogate this is my schedule for Monday.

11:00- Labs
11:30 Psychologist consult
12:30 Personality Assessment Inventory
1:00 Baseline Ultrasound and Doppler
1:30 Nurse Consultation/Consents
2:45 Hysteroscopy, Annual & Regroup with Physician
 
I’m so incredibly anxious to get this appointment done. Fingers crossed the reproductive endocrinologist deems me worthy to carry their embryos. If all goes well it will take 7-10 days to get all my labs back. From there we contract with our intended parents, get a ton of medications, and a transfer date! I can only imagine how anxious my intended momma feels. If you feel inclined to say a little prayer that things go beyond well Monday and results come back maybe a little faster, we all would appreciate it. 
My next post should be full of exciting news, so stay tuned!

“Patience Hurt You”

Years ago I cared for a little boy, and while learning that patience is a virtue, he would repeat the phrase “patience hurt you.” This made me giggle because being patient can be very hard.

I started my surrogacy process in June 2015. After months of emails, paperwork, doctor appointments, and psych evaluations, that November, I was finally approved to be a surrogate. I was hoping to be matched with a family relatively quickly, which proved to be a harder process than I was expecting. While I had a few families cross my path, I either was compromising my morals with agreeing to termination or having to eat a very strict diet of only organic gluten free products. My patience was starting to wear thin. I kept hope and continued to pray that I would be blessed with the right couple for me.

Then it happened.  April 12^th I received a sweet message from a woman on a third-party surrogacy website I had posted my profile on. After exchanging a few messages back and forth, I felt an instant connection with this woman.  The most exciting thing- they live in Kansas! I was lucky enough to meet this sweet couple a few weeks ago, and shortly after we left from lunch together, they called me to say they would love to have me join them on this journey if I’d be up for it. I couldn’t have been more excited and I may have even cried. I already feel emotionally invested and I hardly know this couple. While there is still so much yet to do, my hopes and dreams to bless this couple with more children is sky high. 

Who, What, Where, When, and WHY?!

I have been blessed with carrying two perfect angels and couldn’t imagine the stress and struggles that come with infertility. I have dropped subtle hints and even flat out told my husband for years that I would love to be a surrogate. He thought I had lost my mind and would brush it off.  Being a woman I just wouldn’t shut up about it and he eventually told me go for it. That night, with a zipped lip, I filled out my first application.

The most common question I hear from people when they find out I want to be a surrogate is, why?  To be given the opportunity and trust to carry another life for a couple, to make someone a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, I guess the question is more “why not?”

 There are two types of surrogates- Traditional and Gestational. 

Traditional Surrogacy is when the surrogate mother who uses her own eggs to create the child that she is carrying for the intended parents or individual. Either sperm of the intended father is used or donor sperm. Even though the surrogate mother has a genetic connection to the child all intentions are for her to grant parental rights of the child she is carrying to the intended parents or individual that she has created a legal agreement with prior to the start of the cycle. The child is handed over to the other party right after the birth.

Gestational Surrogacy is when the surrogate mother carries a baby for an intended couple or individual. The gestational surrogate has no genetic relationship to the child that she is carrying. The intended mother goes through a traditional IVF cycle to create embryos using the sperm of the intended father or from a sperm donor that will then be transferred to the surrogate. In some cases, an egg donor might be needed. A woman who agrees to serve as a gestational surrogate must sign a gestational surrogacy contract prior to engaging in the surrogacy. The gestational surrogate must agree to medical evaluation and treatment during her participation in the program. If at least one member of the commissioning couple is the genetic parent of the child, the commissioning couple are presumed to be the natural parents of the child gestated by the surrogate.

The second biggest question I hear is, “how will I be able to give the baby away?” Surrogacy isn’t for everyone. It’s a huge sacrifice to make mentally and physically. I'm sure I will have hormonal days where I think "why did I do this?" Days I cry, days I laugh, and days of pure excitement. I have made the choice to be a gestational surrogate. The child I will carry will have no linking DNA to me. Sure, I will bond with this baby, but I understand this is not my child. I can’t think of a bigger gift to give to another human being than to give them their little life they created. 

While I have just skimmed the surface of my journey, I can’t wait to be able to answer the questions of “who, when, and where.”  My intended parents are out there, and whether I’m matched tomorrow, next week or in six months, my heart is exploding with excitement and butterflies.